somefagonyourdash:

narputo:

When you wiping your butt and your fingers break through the toilet paper
image

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(via toots-toots)

"Call your mother. Tell her you love her. Remember you’re the only person who knows what her heart sounds like from the inside."

wow this made me sad. (via stay-ocean-minded)

(Source: pobredreamer, via hawtstough)

nico-diangelcakes:

nico-diangelcakes:

So i have this giant pencil right

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I think we all know where this is going.

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the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming

(via hawtstough)

"Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’"

Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via suspend)

(Source: katamarang, via hawtstough)

stilinskillme:

remember when Cosmo didn’t tell Mama Cosma he married Wanda so when he went to see her he told her he was out getting milk for the past 10,000 years

(Source: dylansbutt2k14, via aanniiebby)

fappuclno:

when you cant complain about HITTING POST LIMIT BECAUSE YOU JUST DID
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(via aanniiebby)

vegan-vulcan:

titles-for-tangents:

preztelscavenger:

thepondsaregone:

thorinoakenbutt:

castielandpie:

poryqon:

it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same

I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life

For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw

WHAT

excuse me

yes

*southerners chuckling*